From Where I Sit: From a Cocoon to a Butterfly in Six Years
by Gabrielle Ford

Izabel and Gabrielle cuddle on their front porch

Who would have guessed that Gabrielle Nicole Ford - who during high school was considered an outcast, who hid away for six years - would one day be known around the world, thanks to a story on the Animal Planet television network?

That half-hour story recounts my early years as a ballerina, my diagnosis with Friedreich's ataxia (FA), my high school trauma and withdrawal from life, and how my dog's illness - so similar to my own - brought me back to the world.

I sometimes wonder if the kids in high school who called me names think of me now. I wonder if they remember how they tripped me, knocked my books out of my hands, slammed my locker shut while I was trying to open it, threw spit wads at me, and hit and bruised my legs.

Never to Dance

Three days after my 13th birthday, my mother, Rhonda Hillman, gave me the news about FA that started me spinning my cocoon. Mom had waited six months before telling me.

How could she tell me that I would never dance tap, jazz and ballet again? How could she take away my eight-year love of being on stage? Hearing I'd never dance on stage again felt like a knife in my side.

A year later when we moved to Fenton, Mich., and I found myself at a new school in Lake Fenton Township, I made it my goal to hide my disease. I was young and afraid and wanted so much to be like my healthy classmates.

In my junior and senior years, my disease became more obvious. My speech slowed and I fell a lot. I didn't tell Mom about the verbal abuse I received, but the bruises on my legs spoke when I wouldn't.

Mom urged me to educate the kids at school about my disease, hoping they'd understand and be helpful to me, but I strongly objected. I asked her to let me handle it my way - trying to hide it.

I'm sure my classmates knew something was different about me, but when graduation night came, I walked across the stage without anyone knowing I had FA.

Eaten Up With Loneliness

My life changed a lot after graduation. I called the few friends I had in high school, but they didn't return my calls. I felt like an extra piece of luggage. My friends had found a new freedom and I couldn't keep up with them.

If anyone came to visit our home, I'd make my way to my bedroom and hide behind my four walls. I constantly worried: If people made fun of me in high school, what will they think of me now that I can't walk? I was angry down deep about not having any friends, and ashamed of myself.

After two years, loneliness was eating me alive. I asked my mom if I could get a dog. I wanted a black-and-tan coonhound because I loved their big, soft, long ears and sad faces. Soon thereafter, I got my puppy, Izabel - Izzy.

Izzy and I became very close. I told her everything, like girlfriends do. She would listen to me intently, watching with her beautiful brown eyes. I would sing her to sleep at night, making her my everything. It was nice to have someone who needed me.

A Choice Made From Love

Then one day, I found Izzy lying on the floor and she couldn't get up. Mom and I rushed her to the vet. After many tests, the vet said Izzy had a rare, sometimes-fatal liver condition that required specialized surgery.

My mom had warned me I'd be responsible for all of Izzy's needs. So after years of hiding, I had to go out into the public eye, for Izzy.

Caring for her helped change my thinking. I'd frequently become angry while out because I thought someone was staring at me, thinking bad things about me. I'd get terribly upset and demand to return to my bedroom.

Now I had to meet people - from veterinarians to breeders to news media interested in Izzy's story, to people offering to help. Izzy's care was forcing me out of my cocoon.

Into a Butterfly

Unfortunately, surgery was unable to correct Izzy's liver defect, but a special low-protein diet stabilized her condition.

Izzy's illness was like my own: She had trouble with balance, the doctors couldn't cure her and one day the illness might take her life. That odd coincidence led to a wonderful breakthrough in our lives.

In 2001, the cable TV channel Animal Planet sent out a crew to do an episode of "Pet Story" about our experience. For the first time in eight years I opened up and talked about my disease, and it was the experience of a lifetime. The story, "Izzy and Gabe," has now aired 36 times and is still airing.

Another Muscle Disease

But more surprises awaited.

After three years of good health, Izzy again began having trouble with weakness and walking. A veterinary neurologist in San Diego diagnosed a rare progressive muscle disease.

Yes, my dog has a neuromuscular disease. My vet here in Michigan said, "I've been a vet a long time but I've never seen anything like this before. Izzy looks just like Gabe, the two are so bonded."

Now the two of us take coenzyme Q10 and vitamin E. We both require special diets, and have weakness, tremors, fatigue and muscle atrophy. She needs me and I need her. We lean on each other to survive our diseases.

Thanks to Izzy, I'm spreading my wings wider every day. Who knows what branch I'll land on next?

So far, I've filmed two TV stories ("Pet Story" and "Pets and People: Common Diseases" for the University of California at San Diego TV/Internet network). Two national magazines (AKC Gazette and Family Dog) have featured us.

I've begun speaking at schools about neuromuscular diseases and the effects of bullying. I spoke at a national conference on ataxia in California in February, and have been asked to speak in Ohio, Texas and Vancouver, Canada. Recently, the Genesee County Humane Society in Michigan gave us the Human/Animal Bond Award, and Izzy's been nominated for an American Kennel Club (AKC) 2004 Award for Canine Excellence.

One of the best things is that I've made new friends. Thanks to the kindness of a young man in San Diego named Brandon Carson, I have my own Web site. In the guest book, people from all over the world leave wonderful comments. It makes me feel good to hear that my story has helped others, and each comment gives me strength and confidence I never knew before.

My goals are to write a children's storybook about Gabe and Izzy's true-life adventures, continue speaking at schools about bullying and, who knows, maybe even do some modeling!

Meant to Be

My mom, being a positive person, recently said she believes that God knew I'd someday dance again on the stage in a different way. She believes Izzy came into my life to help me cope with my disease. She thinks that all of us affected by muscle diseases can educate the world and make it a better place to live. Maybe she's right!

I spent six years of my life trying to hide but I'm going forward now. Izzy and I are going forward together.

Gabrielle Ford, 23, lives in Fenton, Mich., with her family. Animal Planet is slated to re-air the "Izzy and Gabe" segment Aug. 27 at 11:30 a.m. EDT. See Gabe's Web site (www.gabeandizzy.com) for other upcoming dates.

Reprinted with permission of Quest Magazine, 2004

Dominator Magazine readers were first introduced to Shauna Whyte in the December edition. Her story of courage in the face of adversity has proven inspirational to countless readers. Since we last visited with Shauna, she has decided to stretch her horizons yet again by adding handcycling to her list of world class accomplishments. We are thrilled to bring you part two of this Dominator's story, this time in her own words. For those readers who missed our first article, "Journey of a Dominator", we have reprinted it following "Stretching My Horizons".

A year ago, I sat on a hillside looking out onto the beauty of the Canadian Rocky Mountains contemplating whether or not to compete in the sport of handcycling. It was an exciting new sport that I had originally chosen as a way to train in the summer months to stay in shape for the winter's Nordic World Cup for the disabled. It had quickly become one of my favourite ways to train as a positive, healthy and wonderful way to experience the outdoors, meet interesting people, learn something new and expand my talents. I had learned that handbiking would be in the 2004 Athens Summer Paralympics for the first time in history, and I wondered if it was even possible to try and qualify. Having competed at two Winter Paralympics in Cross country skiing and biathlon for the disabled, I knew that it could take years of training, commitment and sacrifice to compete well at an international level. But to let this opportunity pass by would mean letting the sun go down on a positive prospect in life, never knowing what could have happened. I put everything I had into this chance that would in turn enrich my life.

With my results at the 2003 Canadian Championships, my coach and parents also encouraged me to race internationally. I trained harder, bought a better racing bike and paid my way to the 2003 European Championships in Teplice, Czech Republic. Then in my first international cycling race, in the Czech Republic, on my birthday, I made the qualification for the Paralympics with a 3rd place in the women's handbiking road race. It was an absolutely incredible experience to the start of handbike racing. We hadn't expected that I would do as well as I did in my first race. It was an opportunity that I would have missed had I listened to the voice of fear of failure and limit a possible goal on the horizon.

A disappointment came though when we later learned that a decision was made that there would be no women's handcycling event at the Athens 2004 Summer Paralympics. But to stop reaching out to a goal because of a disappointment or a setback just wouldn't be right. I had found a new passion in bike racing and we decided that I would continue to train and race nationally and internationally in handbiking with the goal of the 2008 Summer Paralympics.

A year full of learning experiences, and it wasn't over yet. I also had to learn how to make the transition from bike racing to ski racing and back again for this summer's bike season. The first transition went so well and I was motivated and felt stronger than I had in years for the ski season. But unfortunately I became sick for some of the World Cup races. My results weren't as good as what they can be but I was happy with being able to come back at the World Cup Final in Mt.Orford, Quebec to win the Cross Country World Cup Sprint Event. It was the 6th World Cup win of my career and it was a great way to end the World Cup season.

After the last important ski race, I took some time off to recovery from racing and was able to become more actively involved in other aspects of my life which I am passionate about-smart risk taking, youth and injury prevention. During this time, I was able to speak for the SMARTRISK HEROES Program which is an award winning, multi media show that is hip and exciting. The show helps to empower individuals to take responsibility for their own lives by taking smart risks. I was able to travel to Fox Creek, Alberta and Kamloops, BC where in both venues the youth (and the adults) were totally amazing!

This spring, training and life have more meaning than ever before. Everyday, every moment has a quality of purpose, to strive for excellence. I have had the opportunity to train and race in Europe this spring and each race continues to improve. At my first race this season, The Open Netherlands Time Trial Championships I was 2nd behind the World Champion; my time behind her improving over last year. In the Tour of Woensdrect, also in the Netherlands, I was 2nd. At the Open Belgium Championships, I won and was in the middle of the men's field. And then last week at a race in St.Joris, Belgium for the first time I was able to stay with the men's peleton. It was fast and furious but I fought not just to stay with them but to prove that I belonged. I won the women's race and some of the other women who I had competed with came up to me after the race and told me that they hoped that I would be World Champion one day. I hadn't really thought of it until then. I was looking at one race at a time. But now, I see yet another goal on the horizon.

The Journey of a Dominator

We live in a world that seeks miracle cures and quick fixes. The concepts of perseverance and resolve in the face of difficulty can seem antiquated, in the disposable age that we live in, but what if life throws you a curve that you cannot evade? When the path is level and waters flat, being open to the life's schooling is simple. But when the grade gets steep and the tides rise, our call to stand and be counted in the book of the brave becomes difficult to answer. Two-time Paralympian, Shauna Whyte, has been counted time and time again. After years of success at the National level in X-country skiing and Biathlon, she was training for the Albertville Olympic games when tragedy struck. A fall would confine her to a wheel chair for life. For many people, this would be the end of the dream, but Shauna Whyte is not most people. Even two more potentially career ending accidents over the next seven years would not be enough to cause her to give up on the dream that she calls her "journey". Now, at 36 years of age, and with two Paralympic Games under her belt, Shauna looks back at her travels thus far and sheds some light into the shadows of a world that is all too often unfair.

When she was little, Shauna told her parents that one day, she would be an Olympian. Having grown up in the shade of the Canadian Rocky Mountains in Hinton, Alberta, she was afforded the perfect preparation ground for her future Olympic endeavours-but location in itself is not enough to produce the winning spirit needed to foster the dream of being a World Cup or Olympic champion. So what was the difference?

"My dad really changed the face of our family when I was seven. He had had enough of not being healthy and felt that he was not living up to his potential. The change for the entire family was overnight, really. One day it was chips and white bread, and the next it was nothing but whole grains and fresh foods. Dad quit smoking and put all of his cigarette money into a jar. With the money that he saved, he bought x-country skis for the entire family; and so it began. From then on, sports and being physically active were a central focus for our family."

Shauna enjoyed many diverse activities apart from her training for biathlon. In 1991, while preparing for the Albertville Games, she faced an equestrian competition that she had misgivings about. She was prodded and chose to race, even though she felt that 'something wasn't right' about the riding arena. As she crossed the finish line, she fell from her horse, hit the fence that was too close to the line and was paralysed. When I asked Shauna to relive this cruel moment and the difficult journey that was to follow, I fully expected her to share her anger, her struggles and her resentment. I should have expected more from this remarkable woman.

"After the accident, it was interesting to watch the reaction of those around me. Some, like my mom, were there as a constant, honest source of encouragement. She said, 'This really is rotten, but you can't change history and so you are going to have to move forward and make the best of it.' She acknowledged that everything was not going to 'be fine', and that made me realise that how it was going to 'be' was up to me. Others, like my husband just could not handle what had happened and pulled away. I don't blame him. He was being asked to accept that his life, as he had known it, was over too. That was really unfair."

Shauna entered into the most important training camp of her life. She knew that nothing was going to be gained from looking back at what had been lost, and so she decided to take an inventory of what she still had. By watching others in her ward, she knew that time was her greatest enemy. She needed to get into physical rehabilitation to retain the strength that she had.

"After an accident, the muscles atrophy quickly and are almost impossible to build back, so you can't wait. I watched one girl in the unit who was better off than I was, loose so much more than me because she was afraid of the challenge ahead of her."

Shauna confronted the challenges and rebuilt her life. In 1992, she sensed that something was missing and knew she had to find a way to put competitive sport back into her life. After purchasing a racing wheelchair with the help of family and friends, Shauna resumed training and placed 10th in the 1996 Boston Marathon. She won bronze medals in the 200m and 400m events at the Canadian Wheelchair Championships that same year. But what Shauna really loved to do was ski, and in 1997 she made her comeback in X-country and Biathlon using a sled like "sit ski". Three weeks after her return, she earned a spot on the Canadian National Disabled Ski Team at the Canadian National Championships and then at a World Cup race qualified to go to the Games in Nagano. It looked like her dream of becoming a Paralympic contender was finally going to come true, but before the summer of 1997 would end, this determined fighter would be faced with an enormous challenge, yet again.

"I was in the lead during a road race. I was in front of the male athletes at that point. As I entered an intersection, I looked up to see a car that came from nowhere. Usually, there are pilot vehicles to accompany the racers, but this time, the wheelchair athletes were unescorted. I guess the driver just did not see me. The incredible impact threw me from my racing chair, which was totalled. The collision left me in physical rehabilitation for the next four months. I really did not think that I was going to be able to compete in the Nagano Games but encouragement from a member of the Olympic Committee pressed me to continue on and follow my dream. I went to the games in Japan. I was not a medal contender as I had hoped for but it was remarkable to be there despite mixed emotions. While I was in Nagano, my husband called and told me that our marriage was over. I was disappointed but not surprised. Too many things had changed."

Shauna moved home to Hinton in the spring of 1998. Life seemed to be returning to normal, until a third accident, this time in a car on a mountain road, would force her to make her toughest decision yet.

"My friend was driving too fast. He lost control and we hit the mountain three times. I suffered damage to my neck and the doctors told me that it was risky for me to continue racing. I did a lot of soul searching, spent a long time thinking back on all of the years of training- of sacrificing. I knew that I had unfinished business. I had to continue the journey."

And continue she has. When I asked Shauna about her most cherished triumph in sport, I waited for her to tell me about her fourth place finish at the Salt Lake City Paralympics, her five World Cup wins, or the fact that she has consistently been in the World Cup Standing's top three since 1998. Once again, I was wrong.

"I am still here. That is what I am most proud of. Being successful isn't about winning- it's about coming back when you don't."

When you listen to Shauna's serene voice, you can't help but wonder if she ever gets angry. After all that she has been through, how can she be so optimistic, so accepting of her circumstances? Does she ever lash out when she hears others grumble about their quandaries?

"Not yet, luckily, because getting angry with someone is not going to help them. It makes me frustrated when I hear others complain about getting older or being discouraged, but the best way that I can help them is by setting a positive example. If I can overcome, anyone can. My work with the Smart Risk's Heroes program is connected to this philosophy as well. Young people need to know that most accidents are predicable and preventable. They need to take smart risks in life and maybe when they see me, they will think twice. Hopefully, I can be an example for them to keep working at the challenges in their lives."

The term "disabled" fits Shauna like a right glove on a left hand. There is no denying that she has lost the ability to use her legs in the way that she used to, but that is where the limitation ends. Shauna asked to reschedule our first phone interview because her family was entertaining visitors, and she wanted to take them canoeing. Never one to rest on her laurels, she took up a new sport this past year, hand cycling. After winning the National Individual Time Trial Championship in June she went to the European Championships in the Czech Republic in September. Despite equipment difficulties, Shauna won two bronze medals. "It was better than we ever dreamed would happen." Now she is focused on training to achieve her goal of being the World Champion in X-country skiing and Biathlon next year. Shauna is by far the most "able" person that I have ever met. I asked her how she felt about this misnomer.

"In Europe, when you win a World Championship, they simply call you a World Champion. The word "disabled" in nowhere in the title. I would love to see this happen in North America someday."

Day after day, this soft-spoken Dominator puts in countless hours of training on the long road that has never been straight or level. As she rolls down the highway during her workouts, drivers honk their encouragement or stop to tell her that they admire what she is doing. Her mom says that she is a moving billboard, advertising what is really possible if you only try. Her courage and empowered outlook on life are an example to those who have learned to say "I can't" all too quickly. The little girl who said that she was going to the Olympics is now the empowered woman who has done it- twice. So where does she go from here?

"I told my friends that if Vancouver got the games in 2010, I would be there. The day that the allocation was announced, I got e-mails and calls reminding me of my promise. I need to train smart. It looks like I am going to be around for a very long time."

Shauna Whyte did not choose her path, but she has taken control of how she will travel it. She has negotiated her way through more than her share of white water and sudden drop offs. In her athletic endeavours as well as everyday life, she chases "excellence" when most around her would marvel at "sufficient". She has had a profound impact on the lives that she has touched. I, for one, will think twice the next time that I feel the need to wallow in the waters of "life is not fair" or cast off a challenge, missing the education that endurance can teach. And that is perhaps the greatest compliment I could ever pay her. Shauna Whyte is an athlete, a survivor, and an inspiration. Shauna is a Dominator.

Teaching Our Youth to Dream

They did not know that he was coming. Parents, coaches, volunteers, and players had gathered at the Holy Redeemer church for the annual Clark Park Coalition hockey wind up banquet. After a successful season, all were present to honor the efforts and achievements of those who had worked so hard to make the season possible. Dedicated parents brought a wonderful potluck supper. Awards were engraved to highlight the efforts of this year's players and volunteers. This scene is replayed all over the nation as minor hockey seasons come to an end, but this program is different. In a struggling section of Detroit, the Clark Park Coalition survives on the dedication of volunteers and the dreams of its children. Word had spread about the tireless efforts of this community to keep alive a program whose primary focus is to give the children in their area a place to belong and believe. Dominik Hasek wanted to stop in to offer his encouragement and see for himself.

The Clark Park Coalition motto is "Teaching Our Youth to Dream". It was easily apparent that the youngsters in this organization have great dreams. They are also learning that you have to work very hard to make dreams come true. In 1991, the city of Detroit was looking to close the park which was at the centre of this community. The local residents rallied, and in the end it was agreed that the city would maintain the park and the community would provide all of the recreational programming for its children. This is no small task considering the environment that most of these citizens live in. In an area where drugs and crime are common place, keeping the youth off of the street and on the ice rink in the winter and soccer pitch in the summer is a challenge that these volunteers take on with their whole hearts. The Coalition provides all of the equipment required, and after the city puts the ice in the rink (the last outdoor rink in Detroit), the dedicated volunteers are responsible for maintaining it. Some coaches, like State Representative, Steve Tobocman, travel from all over the Metro area to offer leadership and mentorship to their players. Others are former residents of the neighborhood who have returned to give back to the community that raised them. Still others are living near Clark Park and are working to ensure that their children have a place to be proud of. These efforts are not lost on the participants. The players clearly know how diligently the Coalition and its members work for them and they share their gratitude the best way that they know how; by playing hard and proudly wearing their team jerseys.

Dora Anaya stood by watching as the banquet guests made their way through the buffet line. Her son, Michael was near by admiring the award that he had just received. I asked her what the Clark Park Coalition meant to her family. "I appreciate the time and energy that is given to my children more that they will ever know," she told me. Dora is certainly no stranger to offering her time freely. As soon as her commitment was finished with this hockey season, she was taking on the task of organizing the registrations for the upcoming soccer season. Hundreds of players would have to be registered and assigned to teams. She loves putting in the hours each year because she sees the difference that is made in the lives of her children and so many others. "Here, we are more than a community, we are a family," she told me while bending down to pick up a little one who had misplaced her mother.

"Family" was the word that I heard time and time again in that church basement. Old and young had come together to celebrate the fulfillment of a dream. The dream that they could keep this program running for another year. The fact that the ice had not been put in until January, that funds continued to be tight, and that more help would be needed to ensure that there would be a "next year" did not color the enthusiasm of the evening. All present knew that this organization was special. In an age when the world is quick to focus on the negative, this group of individuals was proving that with dreams and dedication, you can make a difference.

Mr. Hasek became lost in a sea of kids who had grabbed whatever was closest to them for him to sign. He asked them about their season, and they conversed with him like they were old friends. One little girl was smaller than the rest. She waited patiently while the bigger kids received their autographs. Then she made her move. Tugging at his belt, she looked up with big, beautiful brown eyes and after getting his attention, held up her new medal for him to sign. Once he had fulfilled her request, she gave him a hug and quietly walked away. All who witnessed the interaction were moved.

I asked Alejandro Lujano, one of the program's bright stars, what it was like to meet "The Dominator". He thought for quite sometime and quietly answered, "Wonderful." That was the same word that Mr. Hasek used to describe this amazing program as he was leaving moments later.

For more information about the Clark Park Coalition or to find out about joining the team of volunteers contact:

Anthony Benavides, Director
Clark Park Recreation Center
1130 Clark Street
Detroit, MI 48209
Phone & Fax: (313) 297-9328